THIS JUST IN: ALL OF AMERICA ON FIRE
Long ago, the fifty states lived together in harmony. Then, everything changed when the Fire Nation attacked.
Pretty sure that when MAINE is hotter than parts of TEXAS, that’s a sign of the end times.
I mean this in the nicest way possible, but go fuck yourself San Francisco.
I got a sunburn from standing in the shade for half an hour on Tuesday. True story.
At least in Nebraska it’s a dry heat. A dry, killing heat that is destroying my electricity budget and won’t let me leave the house. Oh god someone help me.
I did the stupidest possible New England thing this afternoon: baked bread, then followed recipe instructions to prop the oven door open and leave the loaf in there to cool. Even my cat is annoyed.
THERE WAS A FIRE FIGHT
This might be the single greatest thing I have ever seen.